Monday, August 25, 2014

Motivational Monday - Building Relationships

For the first Monday in 22 years, I wake without children in my home; without children coming home tonight.   I am in need of some motivation.... 

Over the weekend, while preparing for my Sunday school lesson, I received a "light bulb" moment.  As I read this single sentence...I knew I would write a blog post about it.  "A good relationship is not a monologue, rather a dialogue."  

This was relative to my Sunday school class in helping them learn how to pray and "listen" to the voice of God.   Which, I too was blessed by the lesson, in reminding me to take time to just be still and meditate on Him.  When God "talked" to Elijah he was not in the wind, earthquake or fire.  He was in the still small voice.  You can read about it in 1 Kings 19:11-12.  

In thinking on all of this, I related it to my "new relationships" with my daughters, their husbands and Al. 

It is easy for a mother to create a relationship with her children on a monologue level.  When children are little, you need to give instruction, direction and inspiration, most of which is done as a monologue.  As they grow, you should be creating a relationship with them that becomes a dialogue.  If you are not, you are missing out on the blessing of learning what your children are thinking.   Yes, they need to come to their own understanding of life, their own convictions between right and wrong and their own spiritual relationship.  No amount of your monologue will change this fact.  You need to be a good example; practiced what you preached!  Actions speak louder than words!

I'm not an expert at anything...however, I have been successful at a few things...none gives me greater satisfaction than my children leaving home and creating their own lives.

So, building on the relationships I have already established with them and their husbands - I am challenged by that quote.  These young married couples will hopefully value my advice - not as a monologue - rather a dialogue.  

Lord, help me to remember that.  They have their own mistakes to make and lessons to learn from.  I can think of a time when Al didn't have a job and I was on maternity leave and we drove 3 hours in a snow storm to get some FREE cheese.  Or the multiple jobs we worked to make ends meet.  Those times, the trials, are now, fond memories.  We learned to lean on each other and Jesus.  

I was challenge by that quote in my relationship with Al.  Poor Al, over the years, my relationship with him has become a monologue..."we are doing this, then we need you to do this"...I could give many examples.  He has done so much for his girls - I need to remember that he is feeling the effects of this empty nest too.  

I hope some of what I have babbled on about here, will help you and your relationships.  Whatever stage you are in, the type of relationship you are in...or maybe not in... that you will learn to build a good relationship with dialogue and not monologue.  If we learn to take time to be silent and listen...we just might get inspiration from a still small voice.

Blessings from Ringle, Wisconsin.  

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