Wouldn't it be convenient, if just before a new stage of life begins, you were handed an instruction manual. This is what Dicky Bird's 20, 30, 40 and 50's will look like; you should expect.... Well, life isn't like that. We enter, crawl, stumble, walk and run through each of these and grow into them.
Maneuvering other stages before mid life, seemed more fun and exciting. Going on to school, getting married, having kids, staying at home, starting a business...fun stuff. Mid life on the other hand, not so much. Menapouse, empty nest, arthritis, bad back, child/parent -vs- parent/child role reversals on both levels, end of life decisons....it's all not fun!
Stop it Dicky Bird!! You haven't been called "little miss sunshine" for that attitude! So, today I will share 5 tips on things I've learned thus far in maneuvering through my mid life.
1. You are no longer the "main" influence in your child(ren)'s life. If you raised them well, they will make great decisions all on their own. You don't need to tell them what, when, where or how to do something - truthfully, unless they ask. This happened for me when my girls married. They were only 20 and 22 and I couldn't be more proud of the women they've become and the decisions they've made. They also married true "helpers" they compliment each other. I've taken the lead of my mother-in-law and I stay out of their business....all of it....unless asked. I do not ask ANY questions. Tips 1, letting your children, make their own decisions, while supporting and praying from afar.
2. Keep moving. I should have been better at this and now I'm playing catch up. At one time, I could lift a couch over my head, now I can hardly lift my head off the couch some days. Tip 2, move it or you lose it.
3. Save, save, save. You are rounding the corner in your income earning potential. Work hard at paying off your debt. I wouldn't make any major purchases or at least ones you're not able to pay off before you retire. I've recently been offered buildings to purchase for my business....maybe in my 40's, not now...that dream is done and I don't have time to pay it off. Tip 3, you should be building your "nest egg" and my advice is...put some of it in a coffee can....that way, you have what you have and don't lose it in a stock market fall.
4. Share what you know. Become a mentor for someone or a group. You know, what pleasure in gaining some knowledge if you don't pass it on or share it. My dad had a saying, now I understand it..."Dicky Bird, just when I get all the answers figured out, I'm too old and no one will listen to me." I laughed then and I laugh now at how true that was/is. Tip 4, share with those who want to know, not those who didn't ask.
5. Be the bigger person. "Let it go," forgive, forget and move on with whatever amount of time is left, don't spend it bitterly or in regret. Forgiving and Forgetting is FREEING...all F words....just like the other one you might want to say or do. Tip 5 is "just F it."
If you have been reading my blog long, you know I handle my life with lots of humor. Be happy, be able to laugh with others and at yourself.
Blessings from Ringle, Wisconsin.
So many sensible tips, most of which I do myself. Hope all is well with you in your corner of the world we are living in very strange times.
ReplyDeleteLove your tips Jacky...especially that last one. But I know I would struggle with the one about not asking your grown children any questions. Little Crow doesn't talk...and if I don't ask, he could move halfway across the world and I wouldn't know LOL. One quote about this growing old business that seems to get truer the older I grow is that youth is wasted on the young.... I didn't understand that when youth was forever in my head. ~Robin~
ReplyDeleteForge Forward my friend. Loved reading your wisdom for today. Always inspiring! Janice
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I certainly need tips navigating mid-life lol. I'm turning 50 next month - groan. I only wish my body would cooperate with the movement lol.
ReplyDeletethis is such great advice, you should write a book (or at least the cliff notes). we learn as we go, and children should come with a manual instead of a placenta, it would be much more useful!!!
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